Somewhere Over the Rainbow....

I want to walk up a rainbow. Gently jumping from color to color, basking in all the richness of life and love and everything. I want to walk up a rainbow and comb the hair from my face as each bright color passes through me and gives me the feeling that perhaps I could fly. I want to skip up a rainbow and let the wind graze my skin and bounce from my fingertips into the white clouds just above. I want to run down a rainbow, tripping and jumping and gleefully taking in the joy from the fun that's about to come. I want to dance on a rainbow with my hands in the sky and my face towards the sun. I want to walk over a rainbow and see the world from the other side, I want to see what it could be, what potential it has under the bright rays which will shine on it from where I stand. I want the world to look better when I'm over the rainbow, to smell and taste and feel better. I want to walk over a rainbow and see the real side of people, their thoughts and hopes and fears. I want to see the goodness and love of people from my side of the rainbow. Somewhere over the rainbow all our tears will disappear and our sadness will fade away and there we will see what we have always been meant to see, there we will do what we have always been meant to do. There we will be home!!!

I have met him!!!

So I have met the man that I am going to marry....I wouldn't say things like this normally and I refuse to divulge any private or personal information but I will say that he has changed my life. If you have ever known me in my past life...my single days...you would have thought I would never conform to society and fall in love or let some guy marry me and make me change my name and cook and clean for them and all of the above. Now however things have changed... Although I will never ever submit myself to household duties full time because I think it's both a man and a woman's job, especially if they both have full time jobs to attend to....the duties should be shared equally as with everything in a marriage. Of course I still do go on my crazy independent tangents and such as I have already done but I have fallin' completely in love with another. I can see my entire future when I look at him and it makes me so happy that I find I may come off as pathetic if I were to ever tell another living soul about it. But you know what I think....I think that sometimes being pathetic is ok...it kind of means humbling yourself enough to admit that you actually want another, perhaps even need another in your life to grow old with, to be with. I like to refer back to The Secretary.....



"In one way or another I've always suffered. I didn't know why exactly. But I do know that I'm not so scared of suffering now. I feel more than I've ever felt and I've found someone to feel with. To play with. To love in a way that feels right for me. I hope he knows that I can see that he suffers too. And that I want to love him."



Don't get me wrong...I am still all for being independent and not depending on others for your own happiness cause I've always thought that being genuinely happy is an inside job. I'm not all swooney and gross when I talk about him but I'm not going to hide the fact either!! I'm proud to say that I have found my someone...the someone that I'm going to wake up to every morning and go to bed with every night. The someone that's going to encourage me and love me, to help me and guide me, to have fun with and play with and I will hopefully be the one that he looks to for all of those things as well. That is whats new with me...the newest development in my life and while I am looking forward to the future I'm also preparing myself for anything that might come good or bad. God will lead me in the right direction....and hopefully I will be able to steady the course and go exactly where He wants me to be!!!